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Gary DeVine's Blog

All truth is God's truth

My Depression August 2015 

8/12/2015

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I have lived with depression since early childhood.  Dysthymia is a part of me. I not only want you to know that I have personal as well as profession experience with this disorder, but I want to encourage others who have this disorder.
It is difficult for not only me, but my family as well.  My wife would complain of my laziness and emotional detachment.  She accused me of emotionally abandoning her many times and not being the leader I'm called to be for her.  For my part, I would vacilate between understanding myself as handicapped by depression, and feeling guilty for laziness, lack of faith, etc.
I could identify that my depression left me with little energy to function, or even get out of bed.  I could see that I was practically catatonic; my mind was blank and I didn't have anything to say.   On the other hand, I knew that being depressed did not release me from my obligations.  I was responsible for correcting my mood so that I could  correct my behavior.
To be honest, I didn't always address my low mood as soon as I could have.  I wouldn't make changes until my depression got so bad that I wasn't meeting responsibilities at work or at home.  When it becomes this severe, it is more difficult to make the necessary changes.
I've learned that I need to be attentive to slight changes so that I can correct it earlier, whether this means a change in medication or getting back into therapy.  I know that I cannot take prayer lightly.  Every day I need to direct my full attention to my Father in heaven.  I know that when I pray, it is a good idea to periodically check with Him to determine how I'm doing.  I know that I need the Word daily, fellowship with others, and to be open to the accountability I receive from my wife and my mentor.  This, along with eating right, sleeping well, and daily exercise keeps my mood balanced.
This is my responsibility to my wife, children, church, friends and clients.  God wants me to attend to my spiritual, mental and physical health first, and then address the rest.  If I do this consistently, I can then handle days of unusually high stress or great loss.
God is faithful.  He hasn't left me without resources (1 Corinthians 10:13).  Its up to me to utilize them.
So, I encourage you to do the same, whether the problem is depression, mania, anxiety or anger, take ownership and get the help to address it.

Your fellow disciple,
Gary
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    Gary DeVine is a Licensed Professional counselor living in Philadelphia with his wife and 2 children

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